Sinking Into The Abyss

I‘m cracking. It hurts. The fear and paranoia is returning, slowly.

I cannot withstand battling against multiple triggers at one time. And this time, there were more than a multiple.

My mind is in a whirl, so much so that I no longer know why I’m sad. The more I ask myself why, the faster my thoughts race. I can no longer catch up with their pace.

Teach me how not to feel pain when people attack the core of your existence. Tell me why am I unwanted. Why can’t I have the taste of normalcy.

Am I born into the wrong world? A conventional person can relate to the ideas of common people. While me… I don’t know.

I don’t want to sink back into the dark abyss of guilt and sorrow. I was stuck in there for over 2 years last time. It was as if I was looking at reality from behind a veil that was trying to suffocate me.

The emptiness is heavy. Someone in the abyss is grabbing my ankle and pulling me under.

It’s coming back. It hurts, and I now find it hard to breathe. I don’t want to sink into the days when I was numb…

Logen L.

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8 Comments

  1. leafless
    Oct 25, 2008

    My best advice to you is to ignore the ignorance. There’s a hidden gem within each one of us. It’s their loss.

  2. zW
    Oct 25, 2008

    Looks more like a composition than blogpost to me (“\(;…;)/”) For you

  3. mihara
    Oct 25, 2008

    Dude, you dont sound too okay. Chill out more man.

  4. mihara
    Oct 25, 2008

    You’re not unwanted. Just so you know.

  5. logish
    Oct 25, 2008

    Hi leafless, thanks for that.

  6. logish
    Oct 25, 2008

    I’m fine Eugene. Thanks.

    In order to not feel, I have to be blind, deaf and mute. I’m already a mute in a certain sense.

  7. zW
    Oct 31, 2008

    your theory very chim ~_~, and u’re always blaming my theory. So all of us have something which differentiate us from others.

  8. logish
    Nov 2, 2008

    Whatever I say is shielded from those who aren’t supposed to understand.

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