Being in camp for 5.5 days straight each week has taught me a lot about myself. One, I have an anxiety issue and lack confidence when it comes to learning and executing drills (or anything that requires coordination). Two, I allow people to step all over me because I believe I should always be nice. Three, I have constant anxiety over upcoming events.
Frankly speaking, I have no idea how I will get through the next 20 months of military life. However, I know for sure that I have got to step out of my safe zone and return to my noisy self. I must not allow people to step all over me.
I am exhausted; honestly fatigued from the insane regimented schedule that provides for less than 7 hours of sleep and lack of expressive output.
Hopefully, when I receive my posting, things will become better. Until then, I remain doubtful. I will be flying off alone to Thailand after graduating from Basic Military Training to rest, reflect, relax and recharge. I want to decide on my course of action and perhaps do some domaining business there and write some short stories at the cafe.
Note: I am graduating from Basic Military School on October 2nd.
Logen L.